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    October 30

    两首老歌

       一个黄昏的下午,躺在学校花园的长椅上,翻着随身听里很久很久没听过的音乐,看到齐秦的《原来的我》《外面的世界很精彩》,真的很久没有去听了,记得上一次还是在去年暑假回家的路上。不知怎么的,居然暗暗地流泪,害怕自己患上双重人格分裂症,也许的确是这样,每个人其实都这样。一个沉着镇定的你,一个独自流泪的你。

       为什么不能不去想过去的事情,为什么不能有新的开始,为什么不能不去流泪,可做不到。时常梦醒时分,枕巾早已浸湿。答案只有一个,不是男人,至少不是一个真正的男人。

       早已注销了校内,QQ也不怎么使用,删除了其它所有的MSN联系人,唯一能倾诉的就是这里,属于我内心的天堂,所有人平时看到的,披着各式肮脏的外衣,唯有这里,最后的一片圣地。

       每当夜晚,仿佛变身的狼人,回到原型,思念,悲痛,悔恨,回忆夹杂在一起,剧烈的疼痛在心口,难忍,窒息,脑海里依旧是过去,最脆弱的内心,裸露于众人面前的无助.....

       如果世上还有神,求你救救我,让我安详的死去......

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